06 May 2011
The Friday Belt : Flusser's Dry Manhattan
A retired FBI agent, Mr. Page, teaches sex crimes in the Florida Police Standards Course (police academy) and would weave his bizarre sense of humor into lectures. "There's a man in Jacksonville who can't get an erection unless there's a blue feather sticking in his ass." Half hour later Page pulls back his suit jacket to reveal a blue feather sticking out of his shirt pocket.
Page is at his lectern one afternoon, "A cop in Daytona was in high speed pursuit when he crashed into a wall. Horrible. Poor bastard was unconscious for months. He came to and was starving but could only mumble, 'Ah ghata eett sompun.' The doc says, "You gotta eat something?" 'Ya!' says the cop. 'But your mouth is wired shut due to the operation.' says the Doc. 'Am starvin!" says the cop. 'Okay' says the doc. 'I guess we could feed you through your rectum.' 'Enethen!' says the cop.
So they set the cop up in bed and raise his posterior. The doc puts a clamp in his ass and winds it open. The doc asks the cop, 'Is there anything you'd like to start with?' Cop says, 'I alwayz lik a cuppa coffee for ah start a meal.' Doc says, 'A cup of coffee?' Cop says, 'Ya.'
A nurse hands the doc a cup of coffee and he pours it into the cop's rectum. 'Schtooop! Da pain...etz too muucch!' screams the cop. 'Too hot?' says the doc. 'No.' says the cop... 'Too sweet.'
I still don't get it.
I covered the 'Manhattan' cocktail here in the first Friday Belt. Sazerac rye ($27) and Carpano Antica vermouth ($31) with bitters. Today, thanks to my new economy, we're gonna do a Manhattan for less than half of what we did it for over two years ago. I think it's better. Not too sweet. You with me? Good.
The problem is the vermouth. It's sweet. You need a bone dry rye to remedy that. Old Overholt is about as dry as you'll find. A perfect rye for the Manhattan and cheap as dirt. Between $10 to $15. A bunch of new rye is being heavily marketed and it's insanely overpriced. I suppose to pay for all that marketing. You may be inclined to think these brands are pouring coffee down your... but take comfort -- they'll be found out for what they are.
I used Dolin Rouge vermouth for two reasons. It's not sweet at all and it has history. They've been making this stuff with the same recipe since 1821. And while I would not be inclined to drink Overholt straight -- Dolin Rouge is fantastic with a little ice or sipped like a port.
Bitters, while expensive for what they are, last forever. They're the hidden value because they have such an impact on the drink. I used Fee Brothers West Indian Orange and Whiskey Barrel Aged. A shake of each is damned plenty.
If you're a Maker's Mark Manhattan drinker give the dry Manhattan a try. It's highly evolved and a very smart buy. Last Friday I was pretending to be highly evolved when I received an email from a designer friend. "You going to this flusser sample sale? 246 5th at 28th. 5th Floor." Never too proud to be out of the loop, I write back, "Flusser sample sale?!"
I'm out the door and burning down street when I get more details. Lot's of suits, shirts, socks, belts but no shoes. I get there and am astounded to see some 30 bolts of wool and cotton. The designer snags a beautiful bolt of madras that I'm sure you'll see in Saks SS/2012. Some guy with a strange accent throws on a white linen patch pocket sport jacket with side vents. Fits him like a glove.
I found a belt. But for me - it's a belt I've coveted ever since I saw it on my first visit to Flusser's shop. I cried about it here in an earlier Friday Belt post. Unable to afford this croc-surcingle master piece when I was flush -- somehow it finds its way back to me when I'm poor. Any hump can parade into Polo or Hilfiger and buy seven of these, 12 of those and slap down the platinum card. But when you find something you loved, but had to walk away from -- and you find it again and make it yours -- You're tempted to wear it everyday.