Election Day - 1992

 It's hard being the only Democrat. Not just in a family, but in a couple of towns.

It was 1992, and I was living in Lake Bluff, the poor relation of the frothy rich and rabid Republican Lake Forest bordering our south. A Lake Forest bother-in-law loved to remind me that he paid less in taxes on a two acre, five bedroom, tennis courted French Traditional than I paid on a three bedroom - one bath ranch.

Arguing politics with another Lake Forest brother in law, I suggested he look up conservative and liberal in the dictionary and tell me which one he wanted to be.  He laughed and told me real life was not the dictionary. 

An out of town friend of the ex-wife wondered if there was a city ordinance that all Lake Forest wives be blonde and Republican. I confirmed the ordinance adding it also required they drive a Jeep Cherokee and own a Golden Retriever named Cliché. 

Our polling place was in Lake Forest and I wore my patriotic best.  I stepped into the booth, closed the curtain and scanned the ballot.  Unable to find what I required, I turned, poked my head out the curtain and shouted to the ex standing in line a few feet behind me, "Hey, how do you punch a straight Democratic ticket?" Happy Election Day.

Vote for the White Guy

Chris "A man is as faithful as his options" Rock explains why Obama is whiter than Romney. I only hope Mr Rock, whose genius for gun control, "If a bullet cost $5,000, there wouldn't be anymore innocent bystanders" will seriously consider politics.  Hey, how do you do a write-in vote?

M's 1992 Style Advice for Candidates

"If the mud-slinging on this campaign gets as heavy as the pundits predict, all the runners are going to need a few changes of clothes." 

"When he appears on TV, it's hard at first to know if you're watching Governor Bill Clinton of Arkansas or just an average televangelist."  Blazer, shirt, jeans and tie from Hugo Boss, shoes by Edward Green.

"Bush needs to bring that preppy look up to 1992 with a softer, three button blazer and uncreased birds-eye gray trousers." Blazer, trousers, shirt and tie by Donna Karan, shoes by Edward Green.

"Quayle dresses like an old bureaucrat, and seems about as imaginative and lively." Jacket, trousers and shirt by Baracuta.

"Tsongas looks serious, acts serious, talks serious and patently yearns to be taken seriously, that's too serious." Suit, shirt and tie by Jhane Barnes.

"Jerry Brown needs to appear as a solid citizen, and there's nothing flaky about this vested, pin strip suit." Suit, shirt, tie and socks from Ralph Lauren.

"Bob Kerrey looks as bland and sounds as exciting as a local sportscaster in a small to medium market." Jacket and trousers from Krizia Uomo, shirt and tie from Tango by Max Raab.

"Wilder dresses sharp -- maybe a little too sharp for a Virginia gentleman." Jacket, trousers, shirt and tie by Nick Hilton

"If Duke wants more than the redneck vote, he's got to get street smart. And this outfit should suit him prefectly; he's used to wearing hoods." Denim jacket, hooded shirt and denim jeans from Mossimo.

"Franklin Roosevelt loved seersucker suits.  If it worked for FDR in '32, why not Mario Cuomo in '92?" Suit by Avery Lucas, shirt by Gieves & Hawkes, tie by Robert Talbott, shoes from Cole Haan.

By Robert Bryan with photographs by Greg Watermann

Gore Vidal's Theory on Fudge Bars

"During those years, I ate a great many Welch's Fudge Bars. They were distributed mostly in New England, the product of…yes, you’ve guessed it: the Big-Bircher Robert Welch himself. There was something in those delicious fudge bars which was reactionary. I have since checked with fellow schoolmates who were also extremely right-wing in those days and, to a man, I found that they, too, had been addicted to Welch Fudge Bars.

Yet each, when he left New England and was no longer able to get his quota of Welch Fudge Bars, became liberal. Now I’m not making any accusations. I don’t want to invoke the Pure Food and Drug Act just yet. All I say is that it’s a funny coincidence, and as Tail-gunner Joe used to say: It looks like part of a pattern." Gore Vidal, Esquire Magazine, 12/1961, "The Wrath of the Right"

Duck Politics

(Double click to get it all, yeah?)

It's a pretty good batting average, what? But for politicians?