03 October 2011

Steve McQueen's Porsche



UK Classic Cars Magazine - 1993

The guy who insured pig farms came up with the idea over lunch. Get a syndicate together and buy Steve McQueen's Porsche 911. The marketing guy, who dreamed up porn movie plots, was in for $10,000. His best, a bizarre "I Dream of Jeannie" plot device where Major Nelson's penis size increased with each Jeannie "blink" while being boinked.

The pig farm guy was in for $20,000. He wasn't married, came from money and was boinking the agency owner's secretary. A courageous and ultimately foolish decision. I was married, poor and boinking no one so $10,000 to me was a stretch but not impossible since bonus time was fast approaching.

But January turned into February and rumors of the big day spread across the 20th floor of the Hancock like wild fire on the Serengeti. B-Day finally came in April -- Never under estimate the power of keeping people economically off balance. Account executives sneaked calculators into bathrooms where they would attempt to make sense of numbers in symbolic privacy.

Vice presidents closed office doors and, whether in defeat or celebration, called wives. Celebrants somehow managed to find each other after 5:01 PM and proceeded to drink, smoke cigars, fall off bar stools and show each other their bonus checks.

By midnight, the celebrants stumbled into homes where wives called them beer smelling ashtrays. The tirades cut short only by showing a crumpled piece of paper that turned into a new kitchen, car, bathroom or house. It did not turn into a 69 Porsche. I never did like Steve McQueen.

9 comments:

  1. His 1971 911 just sold for $1.375M
    http://www.telegraph.co.uk/motoring/classiccars/8716085/Steve-McQueen-Porsche-911-sells-for-1.375m.html

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  2. Jeff P- There were 2 McQueen 911s. The one in the opening of Le Mans was a 1970 911s and sold at auction for the $1.375. In this clip:

    http://www.youtube.comwatch?v=_JlyQsWXrqA

    you can see at 2:09 this S has a sun roof which the classified ad S does not.

    Steve McQueen's son Chad has a 1969 911s, also slate gray and he claims it has always been in the family. So who knows what this is.

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  3. I just noticed at 3:34 into the Le Mans video that Bobbie flay bears a striking resemblance to McQueen.

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  4. Bobby Flay resemblance aside (although it may be enough), why don't you like Steve McQueen?

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  5. Anon- Because Jackie Gleason didn't like him.

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  6. Born Stepan Weenovicz in Bradford, England of Lithuanian stock. Not many people know that.

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  7. I don't think Jackie Gleason liked anyone.

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  8. Robert Evans also strongly disliked McQueen. "The Kid Stays In The Picture" shows how opportunistically McQueen cuckolds Evans (with McGraw).

    Years ago, I drove a 911 of nearly the same year as McQueen's, and the owner told me that the "engine was a little off" before I started it up. When I drove it, I had NO idea what he was talking about... it was great.

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  9. Mr Krapski- Brilliant.

    Patsy- He liked Morley Safer and Andy Rooney. Who, by the way, don't like many people.

    YWP- I have a bio of McQueen from the late '90s and it doesn't paint a nice picture of the man. But I love those late '60s, early '70s 911s. They've aged well.

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