22 February 2011

The Boys

There's a sneak preview of Making the Boys this Thursday at the Florsheim Pop Up Shop (109 Mercer) from 6 to 8PM. A documentary about the The Boys in the Band, it's not only a look at the play and film but it's impact (or lack thereof) today. When asked if he knew of, Boys in the the Band, Project Runway's Christian Siriano guessed it involved the Jonas Brothers.



This gay cowboy dressed in all white swishes into a saloon and says to the bartender, "Darling, I'd like a tall glass of cold milk." Bartender says sure. Cowboy looks around and asks, "Say, where is everybody?" Bartender says, "They're out back hanging fags." Cowboy says, "No fucking shit. Gimme a whiskey."

My first fag joke from 9th grade. In the early '90s, my ex-wife worked in a business known for employing gay men. Some were out but many were still in the closet. On our way home from a party I mentioned it was sad they couldn't all be out of the closet. My ex turned to me in surprise, "Really?" she said. Her astonishment short lived when I added, "That way I wouldn't embarrass myself by telling a fag joke."

After the divorce, a good friend who was gay told me he wished his sexuality was a choice. I must have looked confused. "Do you think I'd choose to have my parents disown me? Fear every day I'll lose my job? Fear everyday I could be killed by a mob or from having sex? Do you think I'd choose this life?" And for the first time it all made sense when I said, "As much as I love pussy - you love dick and there's nothing we can do about it." "Exactly!" he said. And then I wondered what my life would be like if I was hated for loving women.
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22 comments:

  1. Anonymous22 February, 2011 08:00

    THIS WHY LOOK FORWARD TO EVERY POST ALL THE WAY ACROSS THE POND THE SHEER DIVERSITY.

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  2. Anonymous22 February, 2011 13:46

    Worst post ever.

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  3. thosetricks22 February, 2011 14:28

    That last line should be shouted across the world, TinTin.
    What a simply perfect sentence to sum up how ridiculous we are for judging, persecuting, segregating and killing people because they are being who they are.
    "And then I wondered what my life would be like if I was hated for loving women"
    Gold star for you!

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  4. Anonymous22 February, 2011 18:16

    And what, may I ask, is the point of this post? Just because one "loves" something, it does not make it right.

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  5. tintin22 February, 2011 18:54

    Anon 8:00 - You and one other person.

    Anon 13:46- Sorry you feel that way. Real sorry.

    thosetricks- Thanks. You have more courage than most men I know.

    Anon 18:16 No point. Sometimes you don't have to have a point to have a point. Sometimes something hits you up side the head.

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  6. Anonymous22 February, 2011 19:37

    Please: Write only about style, not about sexuality. I love your blog, but when I want to read something about sex, I read playboy. Schuster, bleib bei deinen Leisten (German proverb).

    ___
    machiavel

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  7. tintin22 February, 2011 21:26

    Anon 19:37- Playboy?! I never knew anybody still read it. That and German quotes...you must get laid once a year.

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  8. Anonymous22 February, 2011 22:15

    From Abe's shoe, to walking in another's shoes...and it's only freakin tuesday- looks to be a good week on Trad..
    ps- thanks for reading my post on men/women, means a lot.
    keep on.
    z

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  9. Anonymous23 February, 2011 07:25

    @tintin 21:26
    Well, playboy magazine is still very popular in Germany. Perhaps try to translate the proverb.

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  10. tintin23 February, 2011 08:26

    I didn't say Playboy wasn't popular in Germany. My point was it's not very interesting anywhere and it's easy enough to check:

    http://www.playboy.de/magazin/inhalt/inhalt-0311

    I did translate your proverb last night. "Stick to your knitting" would be the best traslation. This blog contains a very diverse topic range. More diverse than German Playboy but cheaper.

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  11. Alice Olive23 February, 2011 08:30

    Great post. Being "free to be you and me."

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  12. Kcaj23 February, 2011 09:25

    Fashion, social commentary, style, and pornography! What a fun, tangential blog and post for mid-week.

    To keep the fire stoked, here are a couple links for everyone to mull-over:

    smagazine.com/blog

    and the New Pornographers at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hpvqU2cmK8I

    And yes TinTin, the term mull-over is a direct nod to your LAGNAF post! Long live FUNK. Jack.

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  13. Anonymous23 February, 2011 10:40

    Oof! Thin ice. But at the end...redemption?

    -DB

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  14. Patsy23 February, 2011 14:12

    Uninteresting trivia, my friend's Uncle Len is in The Boys in the Band (he was also in Fiddler on the Roof).

    And I hate that people hate my sister for what she is without knowing who she is.

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  15. tintin23 February, 2011 14:27

    Patsy- I think the whole army brat life exposed me to kids in school who jumped to conclusions about who I was based on my outward appearence and where I moved from. It happens to all of us but it was made louder by going to a lot of high schools.

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  16. Patsy23 February, 2011 14:57

    I expect at schools with high concentrations of army brats, there were kids whose entire social standing was based on how much shit they gave the new kids.

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  17. tintin23 February, 2011 15:54

    Patsy "...kids whose entire social standing was based on how much shit they gave the new kids." Very true. And they were usually misfits themselves. The cool kids never seemed to be aware of us and the normal kids were usually very normal. Was Len, Motel?

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  18. Patsy23 February, 2011 16:11

    Yes! Uncle Len Frey.

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  19. Anonymous23 February, 2011 17:01

    So... your motivation for not wanting to tell a "fag joke" wasn't based on your realization that those jokes are ignorant, cruel and hurtful, but rather that telling one might embarass and expose you as a mean-spirited homophobe. Nice distinction.

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  20. tintin23 February, 2011 17:22

    Anon- That's exactly what my wife said. It ain't something I'm proud of.

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  21. Anonymous24 February, 2011 10:25

    14-15 yrs ago watched a gang of Chicago wannabe lock-jawed blueblood players judge you based on your outward appearance and from where you came...you're a cool cat...glad I got to know you. Nice post...very evolved. We should all be so lucky as to retain an openess of mind that allows past thoughts to be overcome by those of the present.
    TRB

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  22. Julia07 March, 2011 17:07

    Something about this post reminds me of having to explain to a sheltered college roommate that you couldn't get AIDS after drinking from the same glass as someone who is gay. And this was 1988!!! I find this post to be very compassionate.

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